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#4: How to Coach Yourself

In this episode, we talk more about bringing awareness to what’s going on in your brain and how it’s ultimately creating the results in your life. Additionally, we start to discuss starting to think about changing the sticky thoughts giving us problems.

The Cognitive Thought Model

A brief review of the cognitive thought model. Anything that happens outside of you and your control is a situation or CIRCUMSTANCE (C). It is by definition neutral and a fact that everyone agrees upon. It isn’t until you have a THOUGHT (T) about the circumstance that you have a FEELING (F). It’s actually the feeling that drives your ACTION (or inaction or brain chatter). The sum total of your actions/inactions is what gives you the RESULTS (R) of your life. 

  • Start with a daily thought dump - keep it raw and unfiltered (you can always burn the paper later). (See our handout below for a template.)
  • Separate out the facts, the rest are just thoughts.
  • For any problematic thoughts, take a close look to evaluate: 
    • why you’re choosing that thought
    • how it makes you feel
    • if it’s serving you in any way to keep that thought
    • are there any other valid perspectives

Once you’ve really evaluated the thought - it’s a good time to have compassion for where the brain learned this and why it offered it up. You can become aware of it and allow it to pass in the future. And if you ultimately decide this thought isn’t helpful for your life, you can move toward an intentional model.

Link to daily Thought Model Worksheet here.